David Crawford MD Explains Why You Should Not Give Advice Carelessly

Just because someone is asking for advice does not mean you can tell them exactly what to do. Keep in mind that their problems should be theirs to solve.

If you do not have the necessary training, do not attempt to psychoanalyze their situation. Otherwise, you’ll end up doing more harm than good.

So how do you help someone who is asking for advice without actually giving any advice? David Crawford MD shares some effective tips:

1. Tell a Story
David Crawford MD suggests phrasing your thoughts and opinions in a story-like manner. Rather than giving advice, tell them a story about you or someone you know that would help your friend understand their problems.

2. Use Disclaimers
When giving your opinion on the matter, explicitly use disclaimers. Phrases such as “in my opinion,” “I could be wrong,” and “if I were in your position,” will establish that what you are saying does not guarantee positive results.

3. Validate Your Friend’s Emotions
If you feel that your friends are right to feel the way they do right now, tell them. Sometimes all someone wants is for their emotions to be validated.

4. Genuinely Ask How You Can Help
Ask your friend directly on how you can help them overcome their problems. David Crawford MD emphasizes that you should not do anything out of bounds, even if you are under the assumption that you can help better the situation. Misguided kindness does not produce positive results.

5. Be Careful When You Finally Give Your Advice
If your friend explicitly states that it is okay for you to share your opinion, then you can give them your personal advice. Just remember to do so in a calm, objective manner. Do not speak as if you are a subject expert on all their problems.

Bottom Line
Choose your words carefully. The fact that your friend or loved one is confiding in you means they trust your opinion. So giving advice haphazardly will lead to negative outcomes.

The best strategy here is to be a good listener. David Crawford MD advises readers to focus on empathizing with the other party rather than coming up with what to say. Let them resolve their own problems. At the end of the day, your only role is to support them.

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